OH. MY. GOD.

What a pain in the ass. Sorry for the tremendously long gap in the blogging. I admit, I was slacking big time for a while there, and then, just when I was ready to put the nose to the bloggy-grindstone (really, I swear) Earthlink came a long and fucked me right up the ass.

I'll spare you the gory details, but let's just say it starts with them accidentaly deleting our entire DSL account, and ends with me switching to a new ISP. Say hello to the fine, fine folks at verizon.net, who so far have not fucked me up the ass. 2 points for them.

So for those of you keeping score, my new email is thecommonwombat@verizon.net. It may take me a while to get all the profiles I have on variious sites updated, so just remember. No matter what you may read, no matter what anyone tells you, my email address is now on Verizon.

And no, I'm not getting paid 12 bucks every time I use the word Verizon in this blog.

At least I don't think I am...

Just to be safe, Verizon, Verizon, Verizon.

Anyway, allow me to sum up my week:

1) Fuck Earthlink.

2) Hello Verizon.

Everybody got that?

More interesting things to come. Probably.

Finally, some reality we can use!

I don't watch Survivor. Let's get that out there right off that bat.

Ditto to American Idol, The Bachelor, etc, etc, etc. Last Comic Standing is okay. I could do without the bit where they all live in a house together, but seeing behind the scenes of stand-up comedy is pretty interesting.

Is "Queer Eye" Reality entertainment? I'm going to un-ashamedly come down in favor of Queer Eye. Say what you want, I am never bored by that show.

But none of this is my point. I'm not blogging to tell you what I do and don't watch. I'm blogging to tell you about some reality internet programming that you may enjoy.

They just launched the second annual Comic Book Idol.

What is "Comic Book Idol," you say?

Go ahead, say it...

CBI is pretty much what you'd think from the title. It's an "American Idol" style elimination contest, but held on the internet, and the contestants are amateur comic book artists. It starts with an open call, where artists are invited to show their work. The selection crew then picks 10 artists to begin the contest. These guys can be professional artists (some are, some aren't), but can not have ever done comics work for money.

Then each Thursday an assignment is posted on the CBI site. The artists have until Monday to complete their task and post it on the site. Judges critique the work for all to read, and the CBI-reading community get to vote for the artist that did the best job. Each week, 2 people (the ones with the least votes) are eliminated. This goes on for 5 weeks until there is one person left. That person gets some pretty cool prizes, including some actual, paid comics work.

The neat thing is that it is a really great look into just how freaking hard it is to a) master the art of comic book storytelling, and b) do the stuff at all in the very short timeframe provided. 3 days may seem like a lot of time to you, but many of these guys don't sleep for a few days to get their assignments done. Believe me, it's a rough competition. Comics take time.

Anyway, the 10 guys this year are really talented, judging by their entry submissions, and they only just gave out the first assignment, so there's plenty of time to jump in. If I've peaked your interest at all, You can follow the action right here.

Also, I'm thinking about trying my own hand at the assignments they dish out. For my own edification. Since I have my own professional obligations to meet, I won't be doing my work under their tight deadlines, but I'll do my best to do the work fairly quickly. I'll notify you hear when I get the task done, and you'll be able to find it on my website.

Are you still awake out there? Something funny next time, I promise.

Odds and ends... Lips and assholes...

Tonight, no particular aim to the blog... Just felt I should put fingers to keyboard and see what comes out. So - here we go with much ado about nothing relevant.

1) I've noticed a disturbing connection between picking your nose and talking on your cell phone in public.

Both are things we all do, and both are things that we are disgusted by when we see others doing it. I was driving through the neighborhood earlier today and I saw 3 people walking on the sidewalks, all separate from each other, all having animated discussions on cell phones. And I caught myself thinking who were these assholes with their fucking phones?

So unfair of me. I've used my cell phone on a sidewalk. I've done it in my car. But that was different, I say to myself, Those were important calls. What bullshit. I hereby declare that if you want to use your cell phone in public while I am there to witness it (provided you are not yelling and screaming or using one of those jackass fuckjob walkie-talkie phones) It's okay by me. Knock yourself out.

And if you come over to my house and have a crusty booger that's driving you nuts, pick away.

2) The "Cicadas pounced upon and brought kicking and screaming into my house to be brutally pawed to death" count is now up to 7.

Booger has proven to be quite the huntress. And I, being fairly bug-o-phobic (yes, the scientific name for it) keep finding myself in that position of choking down my utter disgust and acting like I'm so proud that she had brought this squirming, flapping monstrosity to me.

3) If you're not listening to Nellie McKay, go out right now and do so.

I really hadn't wanted to use this blog as a forum for CD reviews and bullshit like this, but I just want to say that I bought her debut album "Get Away From Me" the other day, and it has been in nearly non-stop rotation ever since. One of the most fun, original, and enjoyable albums I've heard in a long time... And she's only 19.

Well... That's a rant, a report, and a proclamation. That ought to cover my bases for this evening.